Daily Message - Volume One

Money as Energy?

The other day I was driving around and pulled into the drive-thru at McDonald's for some breakfast. I only wanted one Egg McMuffin. I realized I had NO CASH, which is completely normal for me these days, and asked if I could use my debit card for such a small amount. Of course!

I work downtown and have many a panhandler asking for spare change. I tell them, "Seriously, dude, I only have plastic." 

I also remember as a kid hearing that in the 2000s (enter Twilight Zone music) we would just scan a bar code or some tattoo on our arm and this would reveal how much money we had or "credit" or "energy" to complete the transaction. There would be no money. And with the above examples, we are practically there. 

All of these new technologies have come to be for our convenience, sure, but it is also opening up another dimension for me and my relationship with money. Money is just paper. Dirty paper at that. But most of us invest a LOT of emotional baggage into this paper. And it's the main reason we work. 

I realized with the need to only carry one thin piece of plastic, that my money is really just an idea. It's the proof that I contributed a certain amount of energy, time, talent and left something better off than I found it; and that gave me what I needed in return: food, clothing and shelter and a little entertainment now and again. 

I wonder if we start to see our jobs as really nothing more than this (energy in, energy out) it would allow some of the political and emotional angst to drop away? This entire website is designed to help you with this angst. But perhaps this one thought (that you need refuge from the elements and food and your employer is in someway--however indirectly-- providing that to the larger community and needs your help to do it) is really all there is to it. 

Martha Beck said in a quote that I keep posted to my computer, "Only strive to earn enough money to do your life's work. Anything additional is unnecessary." And that may at first make you nervous...but if you sit with it for a moment, you'll see that's completely true. 

If we are focused on "How much more money will this bring me?" instead of "Am I giving what I'm getting?", then we will never feel whole. It isn't about money, then, it's about something else.

Money isn't the root of all evil or the source of peace. Money is just paper. Money is just energy that we trade with others. And we have jobs to earn that energy...it's really nothing more complicated than that.

Excerpt from Melodie Beatty's, "Language of Letting Go"

Picture yourself walking through a meadow. There is a path opening before you. As you walk, you feel hungry. Look to your left. There’s a fruit tree in full bloom. Pick what you need.

Steps later, you notice you’re thirsty. On your right, there’s a fresh water spring.

When you are tired, a resting place emerges. When you are lonely, a friend appears to walk with you. When you get lost, a teacher with a map appears.

Before long, you notice the flow: need and supply; desire and fulfillment. Maybe, you wonder, someone gave me the need because someone planned to fulfill it. Maybe I had to feel the need, so I would notice and accept the gift. Maybe closing my eyes to the desire closes my arms to its fulfillment.

Demand and supply, desire and fulfillment – a continuous cycle, unless we break it. All the necessary supplies have already been planned and provided for this journey.

Work is Spiritual

I'm toying with a new idea. I feel I skirt around it on every page on this site. I think those of you who visit THIS page, in particular, are already sensing this concept, and may appreciate more directness:

The workplace is the BEST spiritual practice field.

Think about it: We don't get to pick the people we work with, for the most part. We go there day after day--and often---year after year. Most of us deal with the random public. We are typically someone who has a higher skill set, and that's why others would come to us. And tension, fear, anger...can run VERY high when the stakes are food on the table!

Work, offices, corporations are not seen as spiritual havens. And that's what makes them RIPE for our practice (whatever that may be). In church/temple/nature, in our neighborhoods, with our friends and family, we rarely find the lessons and challenges on a regular basis that work offers. It's almost like we are handed opportunities, with small consequences if we fail, and plenty of time to get it right.

Most of us tend to keep our spiritual side (acts of service, accepting people as they are, random kindness) for our personal lives and believe work is just a whole other category. A primal, dog-eat-dog political fest. We may pray for someone or ask for assistance in dealing with a difficult coworker, but we don't see these as FABULOUS ways to get our spiritual practice highly-honed. We "save" it for people we LIKE or feel sorry for!

So with that said, look for ways today that you can identify situations where you can apply whatever principles or concepts you believe are TRUTH for you. Turn your perception around and see that your most-hated coworker is in front of you for a divine reason.

Excerpt: The Six Boundary Problems

Here’s a brief overview comparing some of the differences between the six boundary problems. As you learn to identify your specific problem styles, you might notice that you blend them together or quickly change from one problem to another. Remember to also think of how others would classify you.

Rigid. He lets everyone know exactly where he stands and that he’s not moving. He is going to do things his way, even if it means doing it alone. Buzz words: Too closed, inflexible, no spontaneity, unyielding, non-negotiable, unchangeable, stubborn, adamant, hard.

Invisible. She knows what she wants and feels but she doesn’t do anything about it in the moment. She doesn’t tell others or assert her limits in a way that will be listened to. Buzz words: Too open, non-assertive, push-over, over-adapts, feels used and hurt, her gut says “no” while her mouth says “yes”, passive.

Distant. He is emotionally or physically unavailable. Others might never know what he wants, who he is or, sometimes, even where he is. Buzz words: Far, unreachable, disconnected, absent, non-communicative, loner, aloof, cold, removed.

Enmeshed. She takes on her partner’s likes and dislikes as her own so she only wants what he wants. She is who he is. Buzz words: Over lapped, yes-man, no opinions of her own, loss of identity, too close, clone.

Intrusive She pushes everyone to go along with whatever she wants, regardless of his or her desires. She acts oblivious to others discomfort or resentment. Buzz words: Sends out too much, pushy, forceful, bulldozer, invasive, bossy, interfering, interrupter.

Hyper-Receptive. He has no time to realize what he really wants- he just is trying to make sure there is no conflict. Buzz words: Takes in too much, tense, waits for cues, fearful, chameleon, vigilant, anticipates others desires.

There is always going to be someone who is not going to respect our boundaries or their own boundaries. The question is -what are you going to do about it?

For entire article and website, click here.

Success Intelligence

'Joy is not in things; joy is in us.'

— Benjamin Franklin

Success Intelligence is about cultivating inner happiness. It is knowing that happiness is not an it; it is a way of being. In interviews about my work with The Happiness Project I am often asked to give a definition of happiness. I have several.

One is that happiness is who you are, minus your neurosis. In other words, happiness is your original state minus the belief that happiness has to be bought, or minus the fear that happiness is somewhere else. Inner happiness is a release from foolish external conditioning and a return to divine saneness.

The inner happiness I refer to does not have to be manufactured or produced. Nothing needs to happen first in order for this inner happiness to exist. Inner happiness— like inner wisdom—is wrapped up inside of you already. The great thing about inner happiness is that there isn’t anyone who doesn’t already have it.

Success Intelligence recognizes the value of happiness. It knows happiness is an important goal because happiness is a great teacher. The more you learn about happiness, the better you can distinguish between deep joy and fleeting pleasures. True happiness is an inner guide that teaches a person how to live well.

In particular, happiness can teach a person a lot about success. True happiness is valuable because, for example, it is a sign of authenticity, and it is a way of knowing you are on purpose.

Happiness also brings out the best in us. When we are happy we relate better with others. We feel more connected, we are less afraid, and we are more confident. Our inner happiness is attractive, literally, in that it attracts happy relationships.

When we are happy we also work better. Occupational psychology research confirms that if you can say “I am happy in my work,” you are likely to be more productive, more creative, and more successful and experience less stress, less depression, and less mental illness. True happiness enables us to be more successful.

~Robert Holden Sunsetpuddle

From Abraham Hicks

Life is really very simple. What we give out, we get back…

The Universe totally supports us in every thought we choose to think and believe. Put another way, our subconscious mind accepts whatever we choose to believe. They both mean that what what I believe about myself and about life becomes true for me.

What you choose to think about your self and about life becomes true for you. And we have unlimited choices about what we can think.

When we know this, then it makes sense to choose, “Everyone is always helpful,” rather than “People are out to get me.”

On Being Right

"Thank you so much for showing me that I'm wrong.
Now I see it. Boy, you're great!"

One of the most important questions you can ever ask yourself is, "Do I want to be "right"--or do I want to be happy?" Many times, the two are mutually exclusive.

Being right, defending our positions, takes an enormous amount of mental energy and often alienates us from the people in our lives. Needing to be right--or needing someone else to be wrong--encourages others to become defensive, and puts pressure on us to keep defending.

Yet, many of us (me, too, at times) spend a great deal of time and energy attempting to prove (or point out) that we are right--and/or others are wrong. Many people, consciously or unconsciously, believe that it's somehow their job to show others how their positions, statements, and points of view are incorrect, and that in doing so, the person they are correcting is going to somehow appreciate it, or at least learn something. Wrong!

Think about it. Have you ever been corrected by someone and said to the person who was trying to be right, "Thank you so much for showing me that I'm wrong and you're right. Now I see it. Boy, you're great!" Or, has anyone you know ever thanked you (or even agreed with you) when you corrected them, or made yourself "right" at their expense? Of course not.

The truth is, all of us hate to be corrected. We all want our positions to be respected and understood by others. Being listened to and heard is one of the greatest desires of the human heart. And those who learn to listen are the most loved and respected. Those who are in the habit of correcting others are often resented and avoided.

It's not that it's never appropriate to be right--sometimes you genuinely need to be or want to be. Perhaps there are certain philosophical positions that you don't want to budge on such as when you hear a racist comment. Here, it's important to speak your mind. Usually, however, it's just your ego creeping in and ruining an otherwise peaceful encounter--a habit of wanting or needing to be right. A wonderful, heartfelt strategy for becoming more peaceful and loving is to practice allowing others the joy of being right--give them the glory. Stop correcting.

As hard as it may be to change this habit, it's worth any effort and practice it takes. When someone says, "I really feel it's important to. . . " rather than jumping in and saying, "No, it's more important to. . . " or any of the hundreds of other forms of conversational editing, simply let it go and allow their statement to stand. The people in your life will become less defensive and more loving. They will appreciate you more than you could ever have dreamed possible, even if they don't exactly know why.

You'll discover the joy of participating in and witnessing other people's happiness, which is far more rewarding than a battle of egos. You don't have to sacrifice your deepest philosophical truths or most heartfelt opinions, but, starting today, let others be "right," most of the time!

Richard Carlson (author of "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff")

Five Ways to Let Go and Embrace an Uncertain Future

This is from an article on TinyBuddha by Lori Deschene. Click HERE for full article:

1. Consider the idea of permanent uncertainty.

Certainty is actually just an illusion. Think about it: is there ever a time when you know for sure how things will unfold? Even with the best preparation, you can’t control everything in the universe. Job security is subject to industry and company shifts. Relationships transform as people grow and change how they see the world and what they want out of it.

2. Stop waiting for something external.

In a post on Raptitude, David wrote about the theatrical convention known as Deus ex machina—or “God in a Machine.” As David explains, it’s “a reference to the ancient playwright Euripedes’ dubious habit of using a pulley system to lower an actor dressed up as God onto the stage, to solve the problems of the characters and wrap up the story.”

3. See the benefits of releasing attachment.

If you’ve formed an attachment to something, odds are you’ve decided it’s a necessary component to your desired life—the home where you feel safe, the relationship that gives you love and support. Now look at it from a different perspective: when you are attached to less, you open yourself up to more than you can imagine.

4. Reconnect with the constants in your life.

Even though there are no guarantees, you likely have a few constants that won’t change in the near future: your health, your mental capacity, your family and friends. At the end of the day, nothing matters without these things. You can have the best house in the world, but it becomes a prison if you’re alone. Your job may offer a million perks, but you won’t enjoy them if you’re not strong in mind and body.

5. Accept constant imperfection.

I think a lot of people have this illusion that someday everything will be OK. One day they’ll have the home, the relationship, the career, the status, and from then on it will be smooth sailing. I know if I’ve indulged this fantasy. This causes us to metaphorically hold our breath, waiting for that moment when we’re finally able to be happy.

Video: Whose Teacup Is This?

Two videos in a row? If you're not into videos, I'm definitely disappointing you here. BUT...this concept of whose business are you in is amazingly useful when we find ourselves stressed-out. I use the metaphor of teacups to make it easier to know when we are in (or out) of our business.

If you prefer to read, you can visit my article on this concept instead:

Video: The Nature of Reality

Well, I tried my hand at a video. The alternative was actually taping myself and that was not appealing to me on so many levels (I'll get over it soon). So, this is a PowerPoint show that I converted. It's on the Nature of Reality...only 3 minutes...a way to ease into your Friday.

Development Questions

Here are a few questions from Tim Brownson (A Daring Adventure.Com), that can help when you are struggling with a problem or decision. Consider copying these into a Word doc. to use the next time you need them (that's how I use them!).

1. What advice would you give someone who had the same problem you have?

Write it out and then change the pronouns from "You should..." to "I should..." and see what you get.

2. How often is my gut instinct wrong?

If you are like most people I know, you will occasionally get a strong gut instinct about something. You will also frequently override that gut instinct and then live to regret it because it doesn’t seem to make sense at a conscious level.

There’s a reason I end every client consultation by saying to the prospective client: “Go with your gut instinct. If you feel I am the right Life Coach for you, then hire me. If you have some niggling doubts, then don’t, because you’re gut will probably be right”

Next time you have a strong gut instinct ask yourself how often it’s wrong. If that’s rarely, then trust it!

3. If I did know, what would the answer be?

A stupid question on the face of it, but it’s brilliance is in its simplicity. Quite often when I ask a client how they intend to achieve something they’ll respond that they don’t know. I’ll almost always throw this question back at them.

The very least that happens is they laugh at it and I break their state (which frequently helps with problem solving), but more often than not they will come back with a solution.

The question gives your unconscious permission to dream and be creative because the reality is, you do know.

The Teacups

In addition to my small business, I also have a "day job." At work, I’m known as the “teacup lady.” I teach workshops Monday-Friday to my local government’s employees: sheriffs, EMS’s, social workers, librarians, etc.

One day someone asked a question in a workshop and my answer was, “I have a teacup, that I am responsible for. I have a little cup and a little spoon and I stir it 24 hours a days, 7 days a week. And that’s all I can handle. It’s a full time/lifetime job. If I try to stir YOUR teacup, there is no one available to stir mine. And when that happens, I feel separate, alone, even afraid. And since I’m in your teacup and so are you, we bang up against each other, we are irritated, even angry. I’m telling you how to stir your cup-- or run your life—and that never feels good.”

From that lecture, people started asking me to repeat that information about the teacups. And they started asking more specific questions about them. Eventually, they became three tea cups. Mine. Yours. And Reality’s or God’s teacup.

Any time you are uncomfortable, stressed, unhappy---and remember I believe EVER goal is only to be happy—we are in someone’s tea cup or we are in Reality’s tea cup.

Once we return to our own, peace returns as well.

What the teacups represent are boundaries. They help us understand what is our business and what is not. When we are truly (and always) in our teacup, we are happy. We know when it’s time to act and when it’s not. We easily and effortlessly perform tasks. We lose all track of time. We are in our own business and working within reality.

In short, we are happy.

The next time you are unhappy, ask yourself whose business you are in. Is it someone else’s? Is it Reality’s? Shift yourself (your thoughts) back to your own teacup and notice how peace is restored.


How to Change Troubling, Persistent Thoughts

Exercise: The Picture Frame

(excerpt from “NLP: The New Technology of Achievement” Andreas/Faulkner)

1. Think of a problem situation. Think of a somewhat troublesome experience or everyday difficulty.

2. See yourself in a snapshot. Quickly go through your memory of this incident as if it’s a movie, but this time pick out one moment, like a frame from a film, that best symbolizes the whole experience for you. As you look at that picture, notice if you are seeing yourself, that younger you, at that time, as if you were looking at a snapshot of yourself at the event. If not, simply begin, in your mind’s eye, to pull back so you can see more and more of the scene until you see yourself, a younger you even if it’s one day younger), wearing what you wore at the time. See it all as an observer looking on.

3. Add a picture frame. Holding that image in mind, consider what kind of picture frame you might want to put around this snapshot. Do you want a square or round frame, or perhaps an oval one? How wide should this frame be, and what color? Perhaps you’d like a modern steel frame, or even an old-fashioned gold one with swirl decorations and doves on it. When you’ve pick out a frame, add a museum light.

4. Make it into a painting or a photograph. How could you transform that picture into something more artistic? You might even want to see it as an artistic photograph by Ansel Adams, or in the style of a famous painter , as if it were a Renoir or Van Gogh. Now take your framed moment and place it between other pictures in the private gallery of your mind.

5. Check results. Take a moment to clear your mind…breathe. Now, think of that incident that was troubling you. Your feelings have probably changed. If not, repeat the exercise using a different frame and a different style of painting or photography until you find one that changes your feelings in a satisfactory way.

Some people want to know how long these changes will last. Check it again now. Check it again in an hour. Make a note in your appointment book or calendar. You will find your thinking stays changed because you used the way your brain codes information to make the change. And you can decide to change it further anytime you want.

Letting Go of Denial

(by Melodie Beatty)

'We are slow to believe that which if believed would hurt our feelings.'

Most of us have engaged in denial from time to time. Some of us relied on this tool.

We may have denied events or feelings from our past. We may have denied other people’s problems; we may have denied our own problems, feelings, thoughts, wants, or needs.

We denied the truth.

Denial means we didn’t let ourselves face reality, usually because facing that particular reality would hurt. It would be a loss of something: trust, love, family, perhaps a marriage, a friendship, or a dream. And it hurts to lose something, or someone.

Denial is a protective device, a 'shock absorber' for the soul.

It prevents us from acknowledging reality until we feel prepared to cope with that particular reality. People can shout and scream the truth at us, but we will not see or hear it until we are ready.

We are sturdy yet fragile beings. Sometimes, we need time to get prepared, time to ready ourselves to cope. We do not let go of our need to deny by beating ourselves into acceptance; we let go of our need to deny by allowing ourselves to become safe and strong enough to cope with the truth.

We will do this, when the time is right.

We do not need to punish ourselves for having denied reality; we need only love ourselves into safety and strength so that each day we are better equipped to face and deal with the truth. We will face and deal with reality – on our own time schedule, when we are ready, and in our Higher Power’s timing. We do not have to accept chastisement from anyone, including ourselves, for this schedule.

We will know what we need to know, when it’s time to know it.

Today, I will concentrate on making myself feel safe and confident. I will let myself have my awareness on my own time schedule.

Moving on with Grace

The Buddha said that nothing lasts...there is no permanence. When we acknowledge this and let it be, we can relax and enjoy our lives.

This is excellent information when we are suffering. But what about when things go away that we wanted to stay? That can be harder to cope with and we can get in the way of the process.

Here's an excerpt from Paulo Coelho (Closing Cycles) that may help:

One always has to know when a stage comes to an end.

If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through. Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters – whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished.

Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an end? Did you leave your parents’ house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting friendship ended all of a sudden?

You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened. You can tell yourself you won’t take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that.

None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things that happen to us. What has passed will not return: we cannot for ever be children, late adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair with someone who has gone away and has not the least intention of coming back.

Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away.

That is why it is so important (however painful it may be!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you have at home. Everything in this visible world is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts – and getting rid of certain memories also means making some room for other memories to take their place.

Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else.

Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off, work that is promised but there is no starting date, decisions that are always put off waiting for the “ideal moment.” Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished: tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person – nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important.

Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust.

Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

Paraphrased from an Old Zen Story

A woman went to a Zen monastery. She was so thrilled to be there---such a holy place, a place of enlightenment.

The first sitting period, she walked mindfully up the steps of the meditation hall. As she was preparing to bow deeply before entering, she noticed a shocking thing. There, at the top of the steps, was a bucket of filthy wash water with a mop protruding from the murky depths. "That's awful!" she exclaimed, truly horrified, and went in to meditate.

The next morning the bucket was still there.

"That's disgusting," she muttered, "this is Zen?" and went in to meditate.

The next morning, the same bucket. She exclaimed, "I can't believe this! This is ridiculous. Someone should do something about this," and went in to meditate.

The fourth morning, there was the bucket, hardly improved by the days of neglect. The woman looked a the bucket and thought, "I'm someone," and took it away and cleaned it.

There is Nothing Wrong with You

Not wanting to be how you are is one of the most significant aspects of self-hate.

We have been taught to believe that it's not okay to feel what we feel or think what we think or have the experiences we have. As children, people didn't like us when we did that so they tried to change us. We've internalized that, and we've taken on that system ourselves.

So now we're trying to change everything we don't approve of.

In self-acceptance, we don't want to change things about ourselves. We don't want to change other people.

We are never going to "get" something---a philosophy, a formula, a fixed point of view---that will make us forever different.

There is no secret that will fix you/me/us.

~Cheri Huber

From "Positive Thoughts" on Facebook

Many of our problems come from within our own minds.

* Stop jumping to conclusions. There are two common ways this habit increases people’s difficulties. First, they assume that they know what is going to happen, so they stop paying attention and act on their assumption instead. Most of what they assume is wrong. The second aspect of this habit is playing the mind-reader and assuming you know why people do what they do or what they’re thinking. Wrong again, big time. More relationships are destroyed by this particular kind of stupidity than by any other.

* Avoid stereotyping or labeling people or situations. The words you use can trip you up. Negative and critical language produces the same flavor of thinking. Forcing things into pre-set categories hides their real meaning and limits your thinking to no purpose. See what’s there. Don’t label. You’ll be surprised at what you find.

* Don’t take things so personally. Most people, even your friends and colleagues, aren’t talking about you, thinking about you, or concerned with you at all for 99% of the time. The majority of folk in your organization or neighborhood have probably never heard of you and don’t especially want to. The ups and downs of life, the warmth and coldness of others, aren’t personal at all. Pretending that they are will only make you more miserable than is needed.

* Don’t assume your emotions are trustworthy. How you feel isn’t always a good indicator of how things are. Just because you feel it, that doesn’t make it true. Sometimes that emotion comes from nothing more profound than being tired, hungry, annoyed, or about to get a head-cold. The future won’t change because you feel bad—nor because you feel great. Feelings may be true, but they aren’t the truth.

* Don’t let life get you down. Keep practicing being optimistic. If you expect bad things in your life and work, you’ll always find them. A negative mind-set is like looking at the world through distorting, grimy lenses. You spot every blemish and overlook or discount everything else. It’s amazing what isn’t there until you start to look for it. Of course, if you decide to look for signs of positive things, you’ll find those too.

* Don’t hang on to the past. This is my most important suggestion of all: let go and move on. Most of the anger, frustration, misery, and despair in this world come from people clinging to past hurts and problems. The more you turn them over in your mind, the worse you’ll feel and the bigger they’ll look. Don’t try to fight misery. Let go and move on. Do that and you’ve removed just about all its power to hurt you.

By Adrian Savage


The Starfish Story

Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.

As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.

He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.

To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."

Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"

At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one."

''Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.'' - William James

(adapted from 'The Star Thrower' by Loren Eiseley)

Live in the Now

We hear "one day at a time" or "live in the now", but this particular passage really brought this into a form that I could hear. It's from "The Reflecting Pond" by Liane Cordes. 

"...by living one day at a time, to do this successfully, we need to realize we cannot undo a single act we performed or unsay any harsh words spoken in the past. No matter how much we may regret or re-feel yesterday's painful experiences, there is nothing we can do to change what happened. The past is forever beyond our control.

The same thing is true of the future. No matter how much we may worry and fret over it, very few of us can predict what tomorrow will bring. We can only prepare for a hope-filled future by living fully and confidently today.

Ask Two Questions

Stumbled upon a very interesting article today that suggests we ask ourselves TWO QUESTIONS when we are stuck or not feeling motivated.

The first question is, "Am I having fun right now"?
The second question is, "Is this what I've set out to do"?

So the first question is kind of obvious...and you know if you are enjoying yourself right now or not. The second question is about goals, values, etc.

If I am eating candy and watching NetFlix, I'm having fun...but am I in alignment with what I want?

Then the idea is that when you are in BOTH, you are really feeling good. When you have the first one (fun) and not the second one (pursuing goals), that can feel like procrastination or guilt. When you have the second (goals are being pursued), but NOT #1 (the tasks aren't fun), then we are to entice ourselves as much as possible to complete the task (think bribes, rewards, etc.)

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