Release all feelings of worry and guilt. Throughout life, the two most futile emotions are guilt for what has been done and worry about what might be done.
Dr. Wayne Dyer
"The reason you suffer is: you're trying to be special."
Sometimes Life just happens, and that can bring suffering, but ask yourself the next time you are unhappy, if it's because you believe you deserve better, you should be recognized more, you should have more than you do...it may be just the thing to help you see otherwise.
Happiness is the easiest emotion to feel, the most difficult to define, and the hardest to create intentionally.
In the spirit of the book "The Four Agreements" and the message of Byron Katie ("The Work.Com" and "Loving What Is") this video suggests we stop taking things personally, including our selves and our thoughts. Have a look:
'When we think that something is going to bring us pleasure, we don’t know what’s really going to happen. When we think something is going to give us misery, we don’t know. Letting there be room for not knowing is the most important thing of all. We try to do what we think is going to help. But we don’t know. We never know if we’re going to fall flat or sit up tall. When there’s a big disappointment, we don’t know if that’s the end of the story. It may be just the beginning of a great adventure. Life is like that. We don’t know anything. We call something bad; we call it good. But really we just don’t know.'
The search for knowledge ends when the self
is no longer afraid to feel. ~Matt Kahn
Are you uncomfortable hearing you are lovable? Do you believe there is nothing wrong with you? Or does that thought make you squirm?
You can hear on one level that there really isn't anything wrong with you. But your social conditioning gets in the way. Take a listen. You might find some peace.
Isha Judd Video
The "anything unfinished" category of clutter is the hardest to see & easiest to ignore, but anything unfinished in the physical, mental, emotional & spiritual realms clutters your psyche. Things not dealt with in the home reflect issues not dealt with in your life. It takes a lot of energy for the subconscious mind to suppress all these unfinished things, but you will be amazed at how your energy levels will increase if you complete all the unfinished business.
(adapted from 'Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui' by Karen Kingston and 'Cleaning Out the Clutter' on Facebook)
'I thought if I grew up, did my best, and made everyone proud of me, it would be enough. I thought if I got a good job, got a better job, made money, and then made even more money, it would be enough. I thought if I could lose ten pounds, get a better haircut, get the right jeans, then lose the same ten pounds, it would be enough. I thought if I could understand, explain, and express my feelings well enough, it would be enough. I thought if I wished, hoped, dared, or dreamed enough, then it would finally be enough. Then I thought: enough. I practice being enough. When I do that, everything is already enough, and this is the day I’ve been saving for.'
~Miller, Karen Maezen. 'Hand Wash Cold: Instructions for an Ordinary Life"
I don't like to clean. Do you? I decided to Google, "Cleaning as meditation" to motivate me to clean my place, and I found this delightful article. Here's the last page (stress tips, naturally!):
Rules for Mindful Housekeeping
Elisha Goldstein, coauthor of "A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook," tells us how to make peace with cleaning.
1. Imagine you're doing this chore for the first time. In your mind, it's just a sinkful of dirty dishes. Look for the bubbles instead.
2. Use your five senses, focusing on one at a time. Appreciate the warmth of the water, the scent of the lemon cleanser.
3. Consider it a neural workout. Incorporating mindfulness-based techniques into everyday life can make you calmer and your brain more adaptive.
4. Don't think of housework as punishment. Goldstein says, "You're cultivating kindness toward yourself."
Read more at Wholeliving.com: Cleaning as Meditation: How to Transform Your Chores
"It is the belief that this moment is incomplete (I need more money, I need more/better love, I need a new job) that hurts, not the moment itself.'"
"Constructive criticism" is a scam run by people who want to beat you up.
And they want you to believe it is for your own good."
That's from a book by Cheri Huber called, "There is Nothing Wrong with You". I STRONGLY urge you to purchase a copy.
"If you had a person in your life treating you the way you treat yourself, you would have gotten rid of them a long time ago."
Seem like too much trouble? To buy the book and read it? You'd rather just read snippets HERE and move onto something else that's easy? Hmmmmm. That sounds like a plan for KEEPING the notion in place that there is something wrong with you. I don't want that for you, just like I don't want that for me.
So maybe this (from Cheri's book) will resonate:
"Self-hate uses self-improvement as self-maintenance. As long as you are concerned about improving yourself, you'll always have a self to improve. And you will always suffer."
Pain comes with Life, often inevitably so, and can serve Life if we don't turn it into suffering—meaning that we don't make a self binding story out of it starring us in the victim role— but instead turn toward and enter it.
And how do we do this? We name our pain: we turn toward it; we enter it; we get intimate with all of its qualities—its directionality, texture, temperature, color, density, shape—going until we reach its heart.
Eventually we emerge; our pain may not be gone, but we now have a very different relationship with it, a relationship that serves our healing and awakening.
—Robert Augustus Masters
'Once we see that of course we are inconsistent, and that we will never hate one side out of existence, we can relax and stop trying to improve. Accepting that we are sometimes this, sometimes that, is the only change we need.'
~Cheri Huber (Author of "There is Nothing Wrong with You")
We are having a human experience, in a unique human body. We are not having an idealistic, saintly experience. We are human. We get angry, we feel sad, we love, we are selfish, we are generous. We are everything. We lie, we hide — we do everything. We are human!
We all have parts of ourselves that we judge. We all have secrets, things we think we did wrong that we reproach ourselves for. All these things have been created through our own self-abandonment. But we must embrace them all if we want to experience love of self.
~Judd, Isha. Why Walk When You Can Fly? New World Library.
We all have a choice of how we represent ourselves in the world, and how we want to be perceived. We also have the power to make ourselves feel better by dressing with respect for ourselves. What I understand now is, that it is a form of respect to myself to dress well.
ARTICLE: Do you take pride in yourself, your appearance and your thoughts?
(via Lifestyle One.Com)
'Love and honor your physical body. To create a relationship that takes you all the way to heaven, you have to accept your body completely. You have to love your body and allow it to be free to give, free to receive, without being shy ...because "shy" is nothing but fear.'
~ Don Miguel Ruiz
“No one can give you freedom but you. This little booklet will show you how.”
Free Booklet PDF
22 pages that shows how to do "The Work of Byron Katie,"normally a book with over 200 pages.
"When you judge another person, you do not define them. You merely define yourself as someone who needs to judge."
~ Wayne Dyer