Cold Shoulder? Who cares?

by Rob Tate
(Atlanta, GA)

This is an interesting topic. To the best of my knowledge, I've only experienced this once. It happened with a colleague who encouraged me, mentored me and urged me to seek a career in training. What I didn't know is that issues of distrust, favoritism and racial discrimination had been boiling under the surface for some time in the organization. With her help, I succeeded and I unwittingly served as a catalyst for a major upheaval that affected many people.

Once the turmoil began, this wonderful mentor wouldn't speak to me. I was a pariah to her. It bothered me at first, but decided to put it behind me and make the most of my opportunity which ultimately turned into a very successful career. It wasn't until years later that I actually put two and two together and realized that she wasn't interested in helping me, she had a hidden agenda.

I regret that I didn't confront her and ask her what happened to the mentoring relationship that she initiated with me. In my heart, however, I know that the relationship wasn't genuine. I was only a means to an end.

Based upon my reality, people who choose that behavior aren't worth the effort. They often have hidden agendas, miserable lives and small minds. You are better off steering clear of them and not letting them suck the life out of you. Over time, they either grow up or get what they deserve.